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September 2008



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Jun. 8th, 2008

TGI What Now?

I love my Job at TGI Fridays, it's so much fun!

I caught the last train home, fell asleep and woke up just as the train was pulling into my station (yes, my own personal station), how lucky was that haha!

Anyway, in bed with a bottle of water watching the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre (soooo good)!

Night :)


Jun. 7th, 2008

My Dream

So i had a weird dream last night and i have no idea why i would ever dream of something like this, it's not even good!

You may or may not have heard of the terrible band "Elliot Minor" but, my band played with them at Slam Dunk Festival (in the dream) and after the show i was speaking to the singer, who in reality looks like this :

Elliot Gay

But in my dream, he looked more like this, but with a centre parting, like curtains, like a proper ruffed up hobo :


So yeah, we were speaking, and despite them actually being from York, they were all speaking in Italian accents. Scanning the floor and picking up plectrums the other bands had dropped so they would have some spare ones (idiots)! The singer was telling me who had produced their newest record but we should go see some other guy to do our album. It was an actors name, wasn't even a producer, i wish i could remember it, began with S haha!

So after this ridiculous dream i learnt that... i hate Elliot Minor even more and i hope they stop making awful music sometime soon!

Kay, thanks, bye xo

Writer's Block: A Last Day Well Spent

If you knew it was your last day on earth, how would you spend the time?
Knowing it was my last day on earth i'd take the time to appreciate everything that's ever happened to me, the good and the bad and share it with the people i care about most, pictures fade away but memories forever!

It's been awhile...

It's been so long since i've taken the time to come on here. I guess it's not even that, I more than likely forgot this page even existed. For some reason however i felt the need to come on here, so i loaded up the webpage, typed in my username (which i only guessed, yes, it's been that long haha) and password and updated a few things!

So, what's been going on with me lately?

I'm going to start with the educational side of my life. I dropped out of my university course. I was studying Multimedia Technology at Leeds Met University. I guess it seemed a lot different on paper to how it actually turned out. Finding myself in a place where, i wanted to give the course a shot to show to my mum that i actually was putting effort into it and i guess the urge to make her proud. She's the only person in my life who i never want to seem like i have let them down, she wanted/expected me to go to university so.. i did, gave it my best shot and it didn't work out. Not on that course at least. I sat down and talked about it with her and told her i wasn't happy at all and i was far behind on work and it was too much of an effort to put my heart into something which i guess i didn't love! Fortunately i've found a course which is more "me"! Entertainment Management! I start in September, actually really looking forward to it, i guess because i've had experience in some of the concepts on the course such as promoting shows, it's something i know i love, i know i will enjoy!

I got a summer job (wooooo), working at TGI Fridays in Leeds, i actually love it there. The people i'm working with are really nice and i've made a sweet new friend out of it. The dudes name is Ross, he's in a pop punk band like i am, such a good guy!

Speaking of pop punk bands, i'm in a band called "We Don't Dance To Love Songs" google it! I'm having such a good time writing music with 3 amazing friends. It's something which i've always dreamed about, being in a band that actually does something, actually gets out there and gives it there all. I know it will take time but i really do believe we have something here, you know when you get a feeling about a certain band that are starting out "oh there going to be big next year" i kinda have that feeling about us. I don't know what it is, i think it may have something to do with the honesty of the band. We're all in it for the right reasons. The music we are playing is all influenced on the music we grew up listening to. The summer time memories kicking about in your back garden listening to music and having a BBQ with your friends. The times you go out skateboarding, just to feel the wind in your hair, the freedom of having no other care in the world apart from yourself and the piece of wood with four wheels under your feet. Knowing the feeling of love and knowing that it is out there somewhere and the excitement of finding that certain person your going to spend the rest of your life with. I'm looking forward to the next few years, i'm still young, i'm still learning, lets hope it goes well!

I had a girlfriend for 9 months, that ended in May/June of 2007, so its now been a year since i've taking any interest in a girl. Or at least one that has blossomed into something, i've had the odd crush on people but it seems that because it came so easy the first time i'm expecting it to do the same this time and i don't know how to act! I guess i miss it and it'd be nice to have someone to share everything with, someone who will always listen on the other end of the phone, even if they're not speaking. My best friend Tom and his girlfriend, although they argue on the phone and she sometimes goes in these pathetic moods (haha) seem to be so in love its amazing! I'm not the type of guy who would just settle for anything, i wouldn't go out on a night just to look for a girl to "hook up with" i'm more into the special moments that make things unique, special and memoreable, i'd choose love over lust anyday! The thought that there is someone out there is really exciting though, i guess i just need to learn how to let myself be open to the concept of another relatonship. I don't know if that is explained well though, what i mean is, there have been moments where i have known someone likes me and i've not acted upon it because either it seemed like it wasn't the right time or it isn't happening how it did before. I guess its best off explaining what i felt before... i instantly knew that i'd be with my ex when we first started talking, it was weird, i had such a determination to make it happen and luckily enough, it did and it was so easy! I just have to realise that nothing can be the same and different situations will bring different outcomes!

It's 1.23am at this point and i feel i have to write more but i don't know what else to talk about just yet, i'm not tired, i'm logged on and my eyes aren't hurting yet (besides the redness due to hayfever)!

My best friend is moving to Leeds, ask me how excited i am? "how excited are you steffen?" VERY! He's just the best guy in the world, i share so many amazing memories with him its unreal, i don't think he knows how much he means to me as a friend! We met when i lived in Spain, going to the same school for a few years and from day one it just kept getting better! For new year 07/08 we went to New York together and stopped in a Marriott Hotel, waking up each day and just grabbing a cab/limo/subway to manhatten and seeing the best city i've ever been to and i have travelled so so many places in my short 19 year life to date! I know when he gets here it'll be so much fun, apparently he won't be living that far away from me either so we'll be able to go skate and if my band gets going he'll be able to come on tour and do merch etc haha, you see, i have it all planned out!

This will do for now, i'll probably write more tomorrow haha!

Byeeeee xo

Oct. 8th, 2006


I'm enjoying someones company right now, we went to the cinema the other day and it was good fun. We went to see click, with Adam Sandler in it, it was a pretty good film to be fair.
Anywayzzzzzz, just thought i'd day things seem to be picking up.

Sep. 27th, 2006


I feel abit ill today, so i've taken the day off college :]
This will allow me to just chill out, get my room sorted out haha, it's not that messy, i just love it to be tidy as. Then i am going to finish some design work for my friends band, woo woo.
Speak later ye ol' computer screeeen!

Sep. 25th, 2006


It has been far too long since i last posted in here, and i know now i have the time to sit down and reflect upon the last month or so.
The summer season was amazing this year, i jetted off to Spain after my AS exams. It was sooo nice to be able to see my friends over there. I stopped at my friend richards house, he is my best buddy over there, such a good friend, funny as anything haha. Then he came back with me to the UK, to stop with me for near enough a month, we had some good times this summer, hopefully next we will be heading off to California!

College this year started weird, as alot of my friends had left. As i made friends with alot of people in the year above me, it was weird not seeing their familiar faces dotted around. I miss certain people more than others.

I have also noticed some changes in people around me, one person inparticular. I'm not going to go into it but i just wish things went back to the way they were, and i would talk to them more, i miss that alot, i started to feel more for them, but now it seems as if things have drifted away, and i know that is because less time is spent

I also thought to myself earlier on that i want something really good to happen in my life. I look around me and i see that people have got themselves girlfriends/boyfriends, and i see that alot of them are really happy. I wish that i could have something like that, i have yet to be in a realitionship that has really had that effect on me, i would pretty much love to feel love. I'm sure it will come soon enough, but i would like that day to be soon. Don't get me wrong, i am content with myself right now, college has started well, i am healthy (as far as i know haha), i have started jogging :D haha, i want to become fully happy with the way i look. I have been that way for awhile to be fair, i haven't been happy with the way my body is haha, sounds so silly, it's just the way it is. I mean i know i am not fat, i just want to kind of 'tone' myself, maybe lose a jean size or two haha :D

I went to my buddy lukes house the other night. That was really fun, i watched his band, Through These Veins, practice, and afterwards we all walked in the dark round his land, and took some bands shots, me being the photographer. PHWOAR, with my super sexy Sony Cybershot DSC R1 digital slr :P

So yeah, i had fun writing this, as always it is good to get thoughts written down on virtual paper, i will write in this alot more often now, i hope some people read this to be fair.

Ta ta for now :]

Jul. 4th, 2006


I haven't been on here recently to write things down, i'm not sure why what is but i decided today that i should take some time to reflect. I went skateboarding with my frieds tom and robbie yesterday, that was fun, but i found that there were people there i didn't really know to well, but my friends did, so at points a felt abit left out. It didn't bother me to much as i was enjoying watching, it was a super summer day and i took some snappy snappys with my trusty digital camera. I have no lead to upload them though, haha, silly me, i should probably invest in one :P
There was another discussion with my girlfriend also. She was at the park when i was skating with my friends, and expeted me to pay attention to her because she was there, obviously i went over and said hi etc, but i couldn't spend time with her, it's not what i went there to do. Then she got semi mad with he later, saying i should bla bla bla, sometimes i think, how can this work when we seem to have seperate priorites. She also said some things which made me seem she wanted an 'uber' serious relatonship, i mean, i do like her, but i know that i can't see myself with her in the long term, but i like how things are now, it's quite a confusing situation really, i'm not entirely sure what to do. I have some people i can speak to these things about, but they haven't been around lately, which is sucky, but ar well, i'll trooper on :D
I'm sat here writing feeling like i am at one with my mind, i am not paying attention to the keyboard, it is something that is there capturing my words, it's a good feeling.
On a lighter note, i really want to go see over the hedge. It looks like a hoot, i know shelley will read this at some point and this is directed at you :P COME WITH ME!!! :D birthday treat.
Well i will be back shortly, i'm going to sit outside for abit.

Jun. 25th, 2006


I'm still not sure as to what i am going to do. I think that we would be best off as friends, but there is another part of me saying that i should give it another chance, but i'm scared that if i do, and it doesn't work out, we won't be friends.
This has never happened to me before so it's a hard choice, who knows how long it would be before another girl shows an interest towards me. I want someone who i connect with. Someone who shows an interest in things i do, even if they don't really mind. Someone who likes to take walks. Someone who i can talk to comfortably about anything at all. This would make me very happy.
I'll be back soon.

New to this.

I recently was told about this page by a good friend of mine, and believe that it is a good way to write down feelings that otherwise i would keep bottled up inside. So i thank her for that, this way it feels like i am talking to someone about my 'problems' or just general banter :D

So recently i have been having fun with friends. My friend Shelley came with me to town to help me with my photography project, Snap and Run, hehe. Then we returned back to my house for fooood. I really enjoyed myself.
Then on saturday i stopped in and waited for my mum to come back from holiday. It was nice to see her again, as she had been away for 9 days ish. She brought me some presents, woooo.

Then in the evening is where i had some problems, which upset me. I have not been feeling the same way towards my girlfriend as i believe she does me. I had to say something, as i kept them bottled up. I believed that before we started going out, we had alot more in common, but as time has gone on, i have noticed some things that don't connect for me, and it's got me upset, as i wanted things to work out between us, it's not that i don't want to commit, it's that i feel i can't with her, and that upsets me, as i do like her, she is very kind and loving, but i feel that we would be better as friends and if we carry on being together, we could drift away further and then there being a possibility we wouldn't be friends.

Ar well, banter over for today, i might come back later to add something positive.


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